Lately, I think I've been pretty good at keeping the blog movin' along... Minus the last 10 days without an update. But tonight, when I finally had the time to sit, reflect and write, my thoughts turned to the real reason why I haven't done just that. Obviously, we've kept ourselves on a tight schedule, so tight that I often find myself with no time left to do what I used to do a lot, and that was workout. But that isn't what I sat down to write about now. (My apologies to my body image. We can discuss this later over a vodka tonic).
The main reason for my very absence began on Day 1 of a no-show-blog. As a "new Rett family" as the International Rett Syndrome Foundation called us, we got a complimentary copy of The Rett Syndrome Handbook. "Handbook" in my naive thinking was a pamphlet-size handout one receives at a college graduation. Or those things your car insurance company send you when you change your policy. Or, in my case, a Weight Watchers welcoming handbook, 15 pages long with the main outline and a few points here and there, and maybe a recipe or two.
No, no, no. I was very wrong.
How intimidating is this thing?
Is this really supposed to comfort us newbies? For some reason, the 311,000 hits I get on Google when I search "Rett Syndrome" don't seem near as frightening as this 580-page encyclopedia dealing with all things Rett. No wonder I am still dreaming about this diagnosis.
I, for some reason or another, am not dealing with this handbook well. Maybe it's because deep down I can be somewhat of a know-it-all. (My parents are rolling there eyes right now at the word "somewhat" having known I came out of my mother's womb questioning just about, well, everything, and then following up with "oh, yes, I knew that.")
Maybe I'm not dealing with this handbook well because it gives me something tangible to confirm my biggest fear and further plunges into my heart and soul just how daunting this damn thing is. (Rett Syndrome. Not the handbook. No... Make that both.)
Maybe I just needed some time to digest this - again - before I became one more bleeding heart out in the blogosphere.
Anyway, it's been an exciting 10 days - no, really, I mean that - and I have plenty of updates to get to, but I wanted to start with this. Because it was, unfairly, the reason the 10-day absence even began.
3 comments:
Have you read the whole thing yet - My gosh no wonder you are overwhelmed. Don't fret - you will get through it just like you have all the other hurdles - We love you Aunt Joyce & Uncle Dewey
ohhhh noooo i have not read this yet! i have merely opened it, looked at the countless subjects, had a minor anxiety attack, and closed it. i've been mulling over when i am going to open it up again. right now it's on my coffee table serving as a sore reminder i should try to at least get through some of it. look at it as inspiration...... not intimidation...... LOL
You could bring it home and we could peruse it while camping in the back yard or contemplating life on the front porch. Actually, I would like to see it.
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