Just Think About It Like the Morning Help.

Anna Banana on her way to Coney Island last week.

We are heading to the Children's Hospital at Montefiore today for a 3-4 day stay...

Anna and I are packing up for the hospital this afternoon and heading in around 4 to start I.V. fluids before her big surgery tomorrow. We've hesitated to tell anyone other than our closest family and friends because it's been a difficult thing for us to talk about, and that is that Anna is getting a feeding tube. 

I've touched on the subject before and I think the words are the hardest to hear. We've changed our terminology from the drastic "feeding tube" to the "g (gastrointestinal) -tube"to now, "the peg." Manny and I went in last Thursday for an instructional meeting with a nurse who works with pediatric G.I. patients and afterwards felt a little better about it. All I've prayed for in the last two weeks since the decision was finally made and the surgery scheduled is for peace. I think the hardest part about this whole "decision" is the actual act of mulling it over and going back and forth between the options.

This has seriously been a long road, considering the first mention of it was in March when we were first told she would benefit from one. Then we were told she didn't need one. Then we were told she did. Then we finally met with the best swallow/feeding specialist, Dr. Abraham, who took so much time with Anna and showed us on screen that she was aspirating, and little bits of food and liquid were going into her lungs. Since we've already had a bout with pneumonia and have talked to quite a few other Rett families who have also been through this, it just seemed selfish on our part to not do this for Anna because of our own fear. This will also ensure she has the most nutrition and hydration she needs and sometimes doesn't get because of her difficulties.

So when I get a little down about it, I just think about what someone said to me that made me feel a lot better. Once our cure is found, all that needs to be done is the tube taken out and all that will be left is a small scar. It will heal within days. It will be over.

For right now, it's the physical reminder (as if we needed anymore, really) that although our Anna is perfect to us, she needs some extra help here and there. And that's how I have to look at this. It's going to be our helper, our bud, and not our nemesis.

So I call on any prayer warriors reading this right now to keep our Anna and our G-fam in your prayers, and if you already do, send up a few extra for us. Pray for a successful surgery (Monday at 1 p.m.) and fast recovery for our Banana Girl and peace and understanding for the rest of us. Actually, make that patience. I may just drive our nurses to early retirement.